Once upon a time, and not very long ago either, you could scarcely move on the forecourts of England for Jaguar XJs at a grand or less. There were so many of them knocking about the place that even Shed, a hardened fan, was finding it difficult to justify their regular presence in SOTW.
But the times they are a-changin'. These old buses are becoming hard to find at sensible money as the used stock falls into one of two camps: ‘pampered and expensive’, or ‘ain’t no bargepole long enough’, with hardly anything in between.
Let’s all shout hurrah then for the Jaguar XF which, almost from nowhere, is now bidding strongly to become the XJ’s successor as Shed’s favourite suggestion for those seeking luxe on the cheap. In the last few months Shed has been noticing an absolute raft of sub-£2k XFs on PH Classifieds, but he’s held off on featuring any of them up to now because they’ve all had expensive-sounding problems. This one doesn’t seem to have any of those, or it isn’t owning up to any at least. The most recent MOT test in October reported one worn front tyre and slight corrosion to the rear subframe. If at some point the next owner opted to replace that, they’d have no trouble finding serviceable used ones at prices starting from around £100.
Our shed is a ‘Luxury’ which of the non-supercharged XFs was a mid-spec choice. Mid-spec on a Jag was of course most other mainstream manufacturers’ hoity-toity supreme. Even the base XF’s cabin was a lovely place to be, stuffed as it was with standard gear like stop-start, dual-zone climate, electric seats, rain-sensing wipers, parking sensors, Bluetooth, the kind of stuff you’d normally be paying extra for in most other 2008 cars. Luxury added leather and sat nav.
If you did buy this XF, what might some of the consequences be? Any car can blow up of course and in the best Jaguar tradition the XF was generous with the opportunities it provided in that department. The electrics in general and the wiring in the boot in particular might cause you problems. Touchscreens, audio systems, sat navs and air cons could all go on strike. The 3.0 V6 petrol wasn’t hugely economical (26mpg official, high teens unofficial), but fuel filler caps did sometimes try to help you to reduce your bills by not opening. Some of the money you saved there could go on rectifying faults with bodywork and brakes. Warning lights might mean something or they might not, you were never really sure. The EML light is on here, but the vendor says it drives. The theatrically rotating cabin air vents conked out. More on them at the end.
In 2013 Jaguar released a 2.2-litre four-cylinder diesel, an idea which for many Jaguar buyers held all the appeal of a £35 spam sandwich. The 3.0-litre V6 wasn’t a paragon of refinement but its 234hp did deliver smart performance highlighted, or highlit, by 0-62mph times that started with a five. There wasn’t that much space in the back of an XF and the road tax on one of these will in 2024 sting you to the tune of £710 a year. The leather on the dashtop might curl back and random squeaks and rattles might be heard.
Those are some of the reasons why you might not want an XF, but what about the reasons why you might want one? Anyone able to remember the launch in 2007 and the subsequent road tests in spring 2008 will know that the first ‘modern’ Jaguar very much has the potential to be a worthy successor to the XJ. Effortlessly soaking up road imperfections, steering sweetly and exhibiting excellent balance, It was universally hailed as the best driver’s car in its class – and everyone enjoyed the novelty of the XF startup procedure with the flush-fitting rotating vents and the elevating gear selector.
As you might guess, the postmistress loves a rising knob at her fingertips and has been begging Shed to make a deposit. He’s not quite there yet because he knows a wounded Jaguar can be a financially lethal beast. There again he doesn’t fancy confronting an angry cougar either so he’s a bit conflicted.
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